Yesterday we had some pretty vicious storms. Luckily, Knoxville is in a valley. This means that most of the actual severe weather hits everywhere around us and we usually get away unscathed.
Last night Mindy and I went out to eat in West Knoxville. (If you live in Knoxville you should definitely go to Kaya Korean on Montvue. It is amazing.) As soon as we pulled out of the parking lot, a hellacious downpour began and we had to quickly make our way to the mall's parking garage.
We turned on the radio to hear the weather.I think the radio stations prerecords the people who call in to report the weather in their area just to fuck with the rest of us. I just can't accept that these people exist in real life.
Here is a sampling of what some of the callers said. I can't make this shit up.(Imagine the most redneck accent ever.)
" yeah. I just stepped outta mah trailer an boy oh boy that there lightning is craaaaaaaaaazy!"
"uhhuh. I'm over here on....this road.....an uh therr.....is water in the road."
"Man this wind. whoa. it sure is blowing hard. i ain't seen none of those funnel clouds yet."
" I'm in Greenback an therr is just rain errywhere. Winds blowing too."
" oh yeah im oher herr near the mattress store. You know the one near the boat place. The weather is bad herr"
I don't even know how these people function.